So yeah, after coming home from American Idol, I got seriously sick, I had a stomach virus for two days and then after that I just felt like shit so I figure I'll start up again with school next week. I mean damn what a way to start out the year right? Haha Oh well, I will make it this year..
Something I need to get off my chest...I work so damn hard. I've been working these past 3 weeks with a broken foot...and I support my damn family. My car had to have the alternator fixed on the 1st day of school yeah thanks car...anyways it cost $400! So I've been saving up for the past 2 weeks and I finally get enough money to get it out of the shop when my mom springs on me that the CABLE bill is due and they are going to cut it off if I don't give her $80 to give them...so now I'm down to $320...so today she says oh there's not any gas in my car and I've been having to drive you and Jesse to school so there goes more money...
Its like the more money that I make, the more it just gets sucked away.
And I know that I shouldn't be upset because its not her fault that she has to ask, but honestly there is NOWHERE for her to work. Nobody needs a receptionist, or a babysitter...
Like she can't work on her feet at McDonalds...because lord knows that she would if she could! But I just really don't know how much I can take.
I know my bills have to be paid every month...my car payment, insurance and phone bill. Those are mine. But its ridiculous that I'm being punshed that she had to help me at the beginning of the month to buy school clothes. Like I shouldn't have to fork over every single dime that I make to her, I mean this is just getting horrible.
I know that she's done it for me for all these years but really, its just getting to the point where I want to say NO.
I really wish that I could find her a job, like where she could sit, and make money. I mean hell it can't be that hard...
Any ideas guys? I'm desperate!
Anyways thanks for listening to my ranting!
Leave me some comments...I don't have any!
Love <3
Saturday, August 18, 2007
American Idol or American Skank?
American Idol was crazy.
Went up there at like 2 AM and got there at 3:30 AM. Stood in line to get in the GA Dome and finally got inside at around 5:20 AM. Then we basically sat around foreverrrr. We had to learn the crowd song which was "I'd like to teach the world to sing" and seriously I HATE that song now. Like it was wearing on my nerves sooooo badly! Anyways, at around 10 AM Ryan Seacrest showed up and we had to do that whole crowd shot thing where he goes "This is American Idol" and we all scream yeah...about 20 takes of that before we got it "perfect" AHHH And then at around 12 PM they begin to start letting people onto the field to audition...and that went soooo slow... So I went and got my hair done at the FREE salon that Garnier Fructis was sponsoring and yeah I got to meet CONSTANTINE from Season 5 of A.I. and he was SO nice :D
Anyways, then I went back to my seat and waited a lonnng time and finally at around 5 PM they called my section down to the field. And they put us into groups of 4...We went up to this little table and they called us foward one two three four. Yeah so you get about 20 whole sec. to sing and they don't ask for your name or anything you just SING....and I did, to the damn best of my ability, after the four of us sang, they called us all to the table and said "You all have great voices, really, but you're just not what we're looking for this year sorry" so yeah then you walk over to this girl and she SNIPS your wristband off, as if being rejected wasn't hard enough already! And you don't even get to keep it as a souvnier or anything! Then we walked up like 50 flights of stairs and I came home...
So yeah that was my American Idol experience.
It was fun, but I'll never do it again, they're only looking for T.V. show ratings basically. Not talent. Because to tell you the truth, EVERYBODY that is at Idol can carry a tune, some of them can even sing like nobody's business, but in the end, its all about who they can make fun of on t.v. really. I think in all they let maybe 50 or 60 through to the next round while I was there...who knows?
Some of the people to make it through to the next round included: A girl who wore a skirt up her ass and HUMPED the 50 yrd line of the GA Dome...
Spinner Man...
and America's Next HeShe Top Model....
Went up there at like 2 AM and got there at 3:30 AM. Stood in line to get in the GA Dome and finally got inside at around 5:20 AM. Then we basically sat around foreverrrr. We had to learn the crowd song which was "I'd like to teach the world to sing" and seriously I HATE that song now. Like it was wearing on my nerves sooooo badly! Anyways, at around 10 AM Ryan Seacrest showed up and we had to do that whole crowd shot thing where he goes "This is American Idol" and we all scream yeah...about 20 takes of that before we got it "perfect" AHHH And then at around 12 PM they begin to start letting people onto the field to audition...and that went soooo slow... So I went and got my hair done at the FREE salon that Garnier Fructis was sponsoring and yeah I got to meet CONSTANTINE from Season 5 of A.I. and he was SO nice :D
Anyways, then I went back to my seat and waited a lonnng time and finally at around 5 PM they called my section down to the field. And they put us into groups of 4...We went up to this little table and they called us foward one two three four. Yeah so you get about 20 whole sec. to sing and they don't ask for your name or anything you just SING....and I did, to the damn best of my ability, after the four of us sang, they called us all to the table and said "You all have great voices, really, but you're just not what we're looking for this year sorry" so yeah then you walk over to this girl and she SNIPS your wristband off, as if being rejected wasn't hard enough already! And you don't even get to keep it as a souvnier or anything! Then we walked up like 50 flights of stairs and I came home...
So yeah that was my American Idol experience.
It was fun, but I'll never do it again, they're only looking for T.V. show ratings basically. Not talent. Because to tell you the truth, EVERYBODY that is at Idol can carry a tune, some of them can even sing like nobody's business, but in the end, its all about who they can make fun of on t.v. really. I think in all they let maybe 50 or 60 through to the next round while I was there...who knows?
Some of the people to make it through to the next round included: A girl who wore a skirt up her ass and HUMPED the 50 yrd line of the GA Dome...
Spinner Man...
and America's Next HeShe Top Model....
Saturday, July 28, 2007
I don't know why...
Well today was good :D Show Choir Pool Party was amazing! Even though I wish Morgan would've been there, it was still fun regardless...
As we were at the pool party, this song came on...
And it's like everybody's favorite, but I mean I kind of wonder if they listen to the lyrics, because no truer words have ever been spoken...
Why can't I get him out of my head? I wish that I could move on
But I really don't know where else to go you know?
So here are the lyrics to Elliot Yamin's "Wait for you"
Let me know if they mean anything to anybody...
[Verse 1]
I never felt nothing in the world like this before
Now I'm missing you
& I'm wishing that you would come back through my door
Why did you have to go? You could have let me know
So now I'm all alone,
you could have stayed
but you wouldnt give me a chance
With you not around it's a little bit more then i can stand
And all my tears they keep running down my face
Why did you turn away?
[Bridge]
So why does your pride make you run and hide?
Are you that afraid of me?
But I know it's a lie what you keep inside
This is not how you wanted to be
[Chorus]
So baby I will wait for you
Cause I don''t know what else i can do
Don't tell me I ran out of time
If it takes the rest of my life
Baby I will wait for you
If you think I'm fine it just aint true
I really need you in my life
No matter what i have to do I'll wait for you
[Verse 2]
It's been a long time since you called me
(How could you forget about me)
You got me feeling crazy (crazy)
How can you walk away,
Everything stays the same
I just can't do it baby
What will it take to make you come back
Girl I told you what it is & it just ain't like that
Why can't you look at me, your still in love with me
Don't leave me crying.
[Bridge]
Baby why can't we just start over again
Get it back to the way it was
If you give me a chance I can love you right
But your telling me it wont be enough
[Chorus]
So baby I will wait for you
Cause I don''t know what else i can do
Don't tell me I ran out of time
If it takes the rest of my life
Baby I will wait for you
If you think I'm fine it just aint true
I really need you in my life
No matter what i have to do I'll wait for you
[Bridge]
So why does you pride make you run & hide
Are you that afriad of me?
But I know it's a lie what your keeping inside
Thats not how you wanted to be
Baby I will wait for you
Baby I will wait for you
If it's the last thing i do
[Chorus]
Baby I will wait for you
Cause I don''t know what else i can do
Don't tell me I ran out of time
If it takes the rest of my life
Baby I will wait for you
If you think I'm fine it just aint true
I really need you in my life
No matter what i have to do I'll wait for you
I'll Be Waiting
As we were at the pool party, this song came on...
And it's like everybody's favorite, but I mean I kind of wonder if they listen to the lyrics, because no truer words have ever been spoken...
Why can't I get him out of my head? I wish that I could move on
But I really don't know where else to go you know?
So here are the lyrics to Elliot Yamin's "Wait for you"
Let me know if they mean anything to anybody...
[Verse 1]
I never felt nothing in the world like this before
Now I'm missing you
& I'm wishing that you would come back through my door
Why did you have to go? You could have let me know
So now I'm all alone,
you could have stayed
but you wouldnt give me a chance
With you not around it's a little bit more then i can stand
And all my tears they keep running down my face
Why did you turn away?
[Bridge]
So why does your pride make you run and hide?
Are you that afraid of me?
But I know it's a lie what you keep inside
This is not how you wanted to be
[Chorus]
So baby I will wait for you
Cause I don''t know what else i can do
Don't tell me I ran out of time
If it takes the rest of my life
Baby I will wait for you
If you think I'm fine it just aint true
I really need you in my life
No matter what i have to do I'll wait for you
[Verse 2]
It's been a long time since you called me
(How could you forget about me)
You got me feeling crazy (crazy)
How can you walk away,
Everything stays the same
I just can't do it baby
What will it take to make you come back
Girl I told you what it is & it just ain't like that
Why can't you look at me, your still in love with me
Don't leave me crying.
[Bridge]
Baby why can't we just start over again
Get it back to the way it was
If you give me a chance I can love you right
But your telling me it wont be enough
[Chorus]
So baby I will wait for you
Cause I don''t know what else i can do
Don't tell me I ran out of time
If it takes the rest of my life
Baby I will wait for you
If you think I'm fine it just aint true
I really need you in my life
No matter what i have to do I'll wait for you
[Bridge]
So why does you pride make you run & hide
Are you that afriad of me?
But I know it's a lie what your keeping inside
Thats not how you wanted to be
Baby I will wait for you
Baby I will wait for you
If it's the last thing i do
[Chorus]
Baby I will wait for you
Cause I don''t know what else i can do
Don't tell me I ran out of time
If it takes the rest of my life
Baby I will wait for you
If you think I'm fine it just aint true
I really need you in my life
No matter what i have to do I'll wait for you
I'll Be Waiting
Monday, July 16, 2007
California Dreamin...
So today was the first day of Show Choir boot camp...
And I must say, I was kind of disappointed.
Like, last year, everybody was excited about camp and everything,
but seeing as I went last week, I didn't feel the pain when I ran and worked out today
I know that I'm complaining over nothing, because it means I'm getting stronger,
but I don't know, it kinda makes camp feel more real if you hurt afterward! haha
But oh well, today we only had like 15 Soundsations because 3 of them were finishing summer school, 2 are out of town, and 5 were at band camp, and like 4 people are missing in action haha we really don't know where they are or if they're coming back or not. So yeah it was crazy today.
Here's some pictures :D
Today was also my first day of work at Jeneane's
And it was pretty amazing, it's definately the best job I've had so far..
Everybody says that waitressing is hard, but if you have your mind on what you're doing and are really nice to people, its not hard at all. But then again, it was only my first day lol
But all the people that I work with are SUPER nice and the girl that is training me is like me in 7 years haha she's so amazing!
But yeah, the girl said that I did really really good tonight and by at least Friday I'll be waiting on my own tables (which means I actually get to KEEP my tips!) So you will have to come see me :D
Anyway, I'm tired, and I'm doing this thing where I try to empty my mind before I go to sleep, it helps me sleep better so yes, thats what I just did!
Comments?
Love <3
And I must say, I was kind of disappointed.
Like, last year, everybody was excited about camp and everything,
but seeing as I went last week, I didn't feel the pain when I ran and worked out today
I know that I'm complaining over nothing, because it means I'm getting stronger,
but I don't know, it kinda makes camp feel more real if you hurt afterward! haha
But oh well, today we only had like 15 Soundsations because 3 of them were finishing summer school, 2 are out of town, and 5 were at band camp, and like 4 people are missing in action haha we really don't know where they are or if they're coming back or not. So yeah it was crazy today.
Here's some pictures :D
Today was also my first day of work at Jeneane's
And it was pretty amazing, it's definately the best job I've had so far..
Everybody says that waitressing is hard, but if you have your mind on what you're doing and are really nice to people, its not hard at all. But then again, it was only my first day lol
But all the people that I work with are SUPER nice and the girl that is training me is like me in 7 years haha she's so amazing!
But yeah, the girl said that I did really really good tonight and by at least Friday I'll be waiting on my own tables (which means I actually get to KEEP my tips!) So you will have to come see me :D
Anyway, I'm tired, and I'm doing this thing where I try to empty my mind before I go to sleep, it helps me sleep better so yes, thats what I just did!
Comments?
Love <3
Sunday, July 15, 2007
Poor Unfortunate Soul
That kind of describes me say oh, 3 or 4 months ago.
I was at the bottom of the barell, literally
I was lying, cheating, "imagining" shit you name it, I was doing it.
I don't really know who that person was, and I'm so glad to say that I'm no longer that girl,
yes, her name was Cady Otwell,
and yes, my name is still Cady Otwell,
but I am NO longer the person that I was during that time..
I hurt the people closest to me,
just so I could be accepted by everyone
and guess what, it worked, for a while
but then one day, everything backfired on me
and thank GOD that it did...
sure it seemed like the end of the world then,
but now,
I'm such a better, stronger, healthier, brighter person
but without that happening to me...
I wouldn't be me NOW, the nicer person that I am lol
That was me then, sure, I look happy but really...look at me now...
And tell me that you can't see someone happier, brighter, and all around more glowing...well if you can't see it, I know that I SURE can, and really I guess that's all that really matters...
But you know,
I'm SO much better.
I'm not lying,
I'm not backstabbing,
I'm just living my life,
for me now, not whoever that was before
that monster that I had let myself become.
Like for real, it was horrible...
Besides the point...
Life is good now,
I'm really truly the happiest that I have ever been in my life :D
Friends are great, I'm getting a long with people I never have before.
And best of all, the one person that I hurt the most with my crazy shit that I pulled,
She's coming back around and thank God for that, I mean I know that we will never be as close as we were, but I mean, I wasn't myself then and I really hope that she knows that, but you know, I'm happy just being able to talk to her I mean gah I've missed her so much. :D
Anyway, Show Choir Camp starts tomorrow,
and I'm really quite excited about it!
My final year of high school is going to be amazing
you know how I know that?
Because I'm amazing now, and I will never let myself get to where I was before..
Oh, and I'm starting my new job tomorrow as well
at Jeneane's which I'm really excited about!
Well I doubt that anybody will read this,
but if you do,
Thanks I really appreciate it...
Love <3
I was at the bottom of the barell, literally
I was lying, cheating, "imagining" shit you name it, I was doing it.
I don't really know who that person was, and I'm so glad to say that I'm no longer that girl,
yes, her name was Cady Otwell,
and yes, my name is still Cady Otwell,
but I am NO longer the person that I was during that time..
I hurt the people closest to me,
just so I could be accepted by everyone
and guess what, it worked, for a while
but then one day, everything backfired on me
and thank GOD that it did...
sure it seemed like the end of the world then,
but now,
I'm such a better, stronger, healthier, brighter person
but without that happening to me...
I wouldn't be me NOW, the nicer person that I am lol
That was me then, sure, I look happy but really...look at me now...
And tell me that you can't see someone happier, brighter, and all around more glowing...well if you can't see it, I know that I SURE can, and really I guess that's all that really matters...
But you know,
I'm SO much better.
I'm not lying,
I'm not backstabbing,
I'm just living my life,
for me now, not whoever that was before
that monster that I had let myself become.
Like for real, it was horrible...
Besides the point...
Life is good now,
I'm really truly the happiest that I have ever been in my life :D
Friends are great, I'm getting a long with people I never have before.
And best of all, the one person that I hurt the most with my crazy shit that I pulled,
She's coming back around and thank God for that, I mean I know that we will never be as close as we were, but I mean, I wasn't myself then and I really hope that she knows that, but you know, I'm happy just being able to talk to her I mean gah I've missed her so much. :D
Anyway, Show Choir Camp starts tomorrow,
and I'm really quite excited about it!
My final year of high school is going to be amazing
you know how I know that?
Because I'm amazing now, and I will never let myself get to where I was before..
Oh, and I'm starting my new job tomorrow as well
at Jeneane's which I'm really excited about!
Well I doubt that anybody will read this,
but if you do,
Thanks I really appreciate it...
Love <3
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